No One Likes to Take Orders: The Dale Carnegie Method

Commentary: This is a continuing series of posts reviewing Dale Carnegie's book 'How to Win Friends and Influence People'. This program is attractive in professional relationships due to it's time tested advice for those moving up the ladder of success. I have been introduced to Dale Carnegie training not once but twice. I attended Naval Aviation Officer Candidate School or AOCS during 1988 through which Dale Carnegie principles were first introduced to me, at least in part. Years later during 1999, I attended the Dale Carnegie school and coursework introducing me again to the Dale Carnegie method and principles.  I will be detailing only one principle a week in a shorter post in order to for you to digest the information. This series  may be reviewed at All the Principles in One Post

No One Likes to Take Orders

Classic Carnegie gives an example in which an office manager never issued an order over three years of working together. Instead, all direction was posited as a question. He always opened opportunity for people to be self-directed and learn from their mistakes. This technique gives levity to people boosting pride, a sense of importance, and encourages cooperation instead of rebellion. 

Resentment caused by brash orders can last a long time, even if given to correct a bad situation. Positing orders as a question makes them more palatable and stimulates creativity.  People accept orders more easily if they are part of the decision cycle that caused the order.  An effective leader will;

Principle 25: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders

References:

Carnegie, D. (1981). How to win friends and influence people. New York: Pocket Books.